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The Sunday Knee-Jerk – Round 13

I think Chris Scott summed up the mood of both Geelong supporters and DTers alike in his post match press conference. “Restrained fury”.

I think Chris Scott summed up the mood of both Geelong supporters and DTers alike in his post match press conference. “Restrained fury”. The byes are a nightmare at the best of times, so when you have the most popular rookies struggling to pass 30, we are already placed on the ropes. Step up the spuds like Birchall who continue to troll with some pitiful excuses for scores. However the nail in the coffin was the fact that our life support was turned off. The oxygen of our team that is Ablett, Pendles and Swanny was missing. What did that entail? Absolute carnage. Oh yeah, the AFL are very close to agreeing to have 2 byes per team next year… HOLY Joffrey Baratheon, it’s time to knee-jerk.

The Legends

Kicking off on a good note with none other than Boyd (152). The legend is back! He is my number 1 trade target this week and is one of few consistent premiums capable of big scores this year. Uber premos are lacking! His teammate Griffen (133) escaped a tag an ran riot, but don’t expect that luxury often. Montagana (146) was always going to go elbow deep on Melbourne, and fist them he did. He had his own footy in the 1st half! Almost the perfect DTer. Riewoldt (114) was a great addition to my team this week and gets a mention for his 250th. Absolute champ. Happy to have JJK (131) here as an Eagles fan, but after trading him out last week I’m slightly pissed off! Bad move, but still not sure he’s a keeper, don’t get blinded by 1 good score. 8 tackles make for good padding! Cox (123) was back to his very best, those who were ruling him out as a top 2 ruck take note! Terlich (100) really saved my bacon this week, he looks a D7 keeper. In fact he’ll push for a spot on my field with so many premos spudding it. Barlow (124) was pushing for 150 before he went off with a suspected broken jaw. Let’s pray to the gods that it isn’t that serious, he was just hitting top form. Bear in mind he didn’t score for the first 15 minutes!!! Swallow (129) also repaid his owners with a breakout big score, certainly will be a POD in the run home. SJ (132) put his hand up for captaincy duties whenever things get dire, proving his new role means past scores are just that, past scores. Bartel (125) enjoyed the NBA action, as strenuous as that was… where was the worry?! Selwood (121) looks to have put his poor start behind him and my boy Stokesy (116) fired up again! Gun selection if you can fit him in, smallest man on the field with a huge 11 marks!

The Sunday Chops

Ok, down to business. Let’s start softly… Franklin (67). I wouldn’t pay a quarter of the figures that are going around for him. Clarkson came out after the game and admitted they have been working on delivering the ball around Buddy as he attracts the most attention. The Hawks are happy, we are not. Burgoyne (55) is a team man, not a premium DTer. Forget the odd game when he seems everywhere through the midfield, just remember the pain you felt that day when you didn’t spot him until midway through the last. Ellis (60) owed me last week and delivered. Now he owes me again! He seems in prime position to be traded but he actually has the best 5 round average of any premium defender! I’ll hold and forgive. One bloke who is tough to forgive is Vlastuin (32). By god man you’ve been fantastic but jesus, the week we needed you! He went off with a quad concern during the 4th but was previously unsighted anyway. A late +12 saved him from a certain spot on the chopping block. If only people were putting their hands up to replace him… Birchall (32). He can’t be saved. His value has almost halved from it’s peak after scoring 156 against Fremantle. Those were the days. Hanley (56) has suddenly gone from up and coming half back flanker to full time forward. MV pain, you’ve done it again. Goodes (58) sneaks into the chops. Just last week we were flooded with D7 options, now we’re struggling to even look at our defence line altogether. How things change. Speaking of which, Hrovat (15). The pure elation when he was named for the doggies was met by the polar opposite when he donned the red vest late in the 3rd. 15 points… Even I’d be a cheeky shout to do better, 18 from 2 forward pocket goals before I leave the ground on a stretcher thinking I’m the King of Britan being carried to a feast. GAWN.

The Clown

Brisbane’s fairytale ending saved Voss from another clown entry, Hanley up forward is beyond belief. But no, the clown came from a different team on Sunday. How Geelong managed to lose that is simply beyond me, and there was 2 clowns in particular that handed Brisbane a chance at victory. Why big Dawson Simpson played on immediately after marking that ball on the wing makes about as much sense as George W. Bush at the podium. As we all know they turned the ball over and Brisbane got the ball up the other end with 1 second on the clock. Captain courageous Joel Selwood also had the chance to pass it backwards to my man Stokesy but played on up the line… Just desserts!

What we’ve learnt?

  • The expression “It’s not over, till it’s over” has reached new heights
  • Watching Melbourne play at times has me at my wits end. Sometimes it feels like placing my testicles in a nutcracker.
  • Brisbane’s stunning win may just save North Melbourne the spotlight after notching just 29 points in a full game of AFL, the early finals favorites are now out of the running, sitting at 4-8.
  • We’re the test subject, the byes are the spinning fan blades and no carnage is the tomato. Anyone see where I’m going with this? Try not to laugh.
  • Unfortunately Hrovat’s selection ended up being as helpful as facing a fire squad wearing nothing but a morph suit made of nylon.
  • Brisbane are a DT virus, Voss is chief germ.
  • Safe to say I won’t be listening to N Sync anytime soon
  • Good day is now my go to exit line… Can’t say the word ***. It can find itself a spot next to ****. Use your imagination.
  • Owning premium defenders is seemingly as effective as blow drying your hair in a bathtub.

This game sh*ts me

Pretty simple really. A third of my team failed to even pass 80, bearing in mind I only fielded 3 rooks. I know quite a few teams who had a third of their team score under 50. Why is it that when we need our players to stand up the most, they crumble? Every man and his dog on a DT list had the chance to shine over the MBR’s and I can guarantee you that 70% of those that failed this week will ton up from our pines the next. And that’s why this game sh*ts me.

The other bits and pieces.

I crawled with 1 arm and no legs to a score of 1739 this week, not bad considering. For some this Round spelt season over, for others it was a huge rise up the rankings. We need to forget the past, put the bad scores behind us and fill our teams with premos for some regular footy packed action next week! Cheers.

I didn’t think I could top the sloth look a like last week, but I’m almost convinced…

If you enjoyed my raging and want a hittable punching bag when sh*t goes tits up, follow me on twitter @MattCraigDT. My views are honest, mostly helpful and occasionally entertaining! Also hit me up with any suggestions for who you thought were the Legends, Losers and Clowns, plus what you’ve learnt the past week. I value everyone’s opinion!



  1. Simon

    June 23, 2013 at 10:17 pm

    Trade system shits me…
    Want to trade out O’Meara, move Blicavs to the midfield and move Rowe to the ruck but it won’t let me!

    What’s the point of DPP if you can’t use them

    • Matt

      June 23, 2013 at 10:24 pm

      That was another thing! Can’t get in Wilson because you can’t do 2 DPP moves in 1 trade… no sense

      • Simon

        June 23, 2013 at 10:29 pm

        Exactly what I’m trying to do!

      • Michael

        June 23, 2013 at 11:40 pm

        i might be wrong, but i think u have do the first dpp move then complete the trade then go back to the trade page and do the 2nd dpp move

        • mfawcett

          June 24, 2013 at 2:15 am

          Normally you would be right Michael, but in this case due to Blicvas being the only DPP Ruck/Mid unless you replace Blicvas with another ruck at the same time it won’t work.

  2. Jack


    June 23, 2013 at 10:20 pm

    Great read mate..
    Martin or stokes for Dwyer

    • Jack


      June 23, 2013 at 10:21 pm

      That’s dustin Martin

      • Sean Roberts

        June 23, 2013 at 10:34 pm

        i would go martin

    • Jack

      June 23, 2013 at 10:26 pm


    • Thomas

      June 23, 2013 at 10:28 pm


    • Jake

      June 23, 2013 at 10:33 pm


    • Stange

      June 23, 2013 at 10:39 pm


    • Timothy

      June 23, 2013 at 10:51 pm

      stokes POD

  3. Rory


    June 23, 2013 at 10:30 pm

    Loving the metaphors heheh.

    • Matt

      June 23, 2013 at 10:39 pm

      hehe :)

  4. Jake

    June 23, 2013 at 10:32 pm

    Who is a good defender to get??/ Houli, Harbrow, Mckenize, Johnson
    And who should i get for a.goodes?

    • Hotties

      June 23, 2013 at 10:38 pm

      id be looking at ellis. hes a good player and not overpriced yet.

    • Timothy

      June 23, 2013 at 10:53 pm

      houli or mckenzie, michael johnson is a KPP he wont score like that every week, id get in stokes or nick riewoldt for goodes

      • True sovereignty

        June 24, 2013 at 1:56 pm

        Uhhh Tim, maybe you shouldn’t comment on players who’s team you clearly don’t watch very often, if at all. Michael Johnson plays mainly as a third tall, but is also a major re bounder for Freo. He also sneaks forward and kicks goals at times. He gets a lot of the ball for a “tall”. His last 5 scores have been 98, 108, 95, 107 and 109. So much for him not “scoring” like that every week. It’s good that you’re giving advice as that’s what DT talk is for, but just make sure you know what your talking about next time, please.

  5. Daniel

    June 23, 2013 at 10:39 pm

    Between DT and SC I managed to have my name next to all of these potatoes:

    Birchall, Burgoyne, Mayes, Pittard, Hrovat, Vlastuin, B Goodes, Hanley, Sam Mitchell, Franklin, Cotchin, Deledio, Maric… & Thurlow dropped just to make sure one more of these fabulous scores featured in my ‘best’ 18.

    I feel like Homer Simpson gradually ripping more & more of his hair out each time he learns Marge is pregnant.

  6. Elliott Dwyer-Long

    Elliott Dwyer-Long

    June 23, 2013 at 10:44 pm

    I wouldn’t get any of those…Stick with the expensive reliable ones if you ask me…I got screwed over by Heath Shaw and Burgoyne…Go for people like Gibbs, Heppel, Goddard, Ibbotson, Enright and Hibberd.

  7. Dimmy

    June 23, 2013 at 10:48 pm

    The awkward moment when you don’t know to trade out Spuddy Franklin or Vlastuin.. Leaning towards trading Spuddy having him since round 1…

    • Timothy

      June 23, 2013 at 10:55 pm

      vlastuin needs to go imo, he’ll fall away like ollie wines i feel, o’meara and terlich are the standout rookies this season so far

      • Dimmy

        June 23, 2013 at 11:10 pm

        Yes but look at Buddy haha he’s more of just a goal kicker not a dreat team player

        • inthefog

          June 23, 2013 at 11:12 pm

          They’re too selfless, the Hawks. Not a player averaging in the 100’s.

  8. Harry Hannaford

    June 23, 2013 at 10:50 pm

    Worst trade for this year: O’meara > Horvat! FMDT

  9. Harry Hannaford

    June 23, 2013 at 10:54 pm

    Vlastiun > Gibbs

    $210,000 left

  10. colesy

    June 23, 2013 at 10:58 pm

    Can we expect Ibbotson to go Birchall v.3? 100+ point average down to the sub 90s. I can see it happening!!!

    • inthefog

      June 23, 2013 at 11:06 pm

      Well, I wouldn’t be bringing him in this week. Geelong away from home will probably see him scoring sub 90’s.

      What defenders can we actually trust? Goddard and Heppell are the only ones i’d bank on averaging close to 100 here on out.

      • Sphincter

        June 24, 2013 at 1:42 pm

        Gibbs is reliable although probably wont average over 100

  11. Hodgy

    June 23, 2013 at 11:04 pm

    Do I go rowe to daniher and birch to Heppell
    Do i go troy menzel to daniher and birch to hibberd as i wont have enough to get heppell/Ibbo/Boyd or is there someone else im not considering ???
    Ive already got Goddard/Gibbs/Ellis

    • Ammanuel

      June 23, 2013 at 11:07 pm

      I’d say go with option 1

  12. mbrucie

    June 23, 2013 at 11:04 pm

    Nice read as always…Is Hibberd a top 6 defender? Is Jobe a top 10 midfielder?

    • coxtapstoswallow

      June 23, 2013 at 11:19 pm

      no and yes

      • mbrucie

        June 23, 2013 at 11:38 pm

        Cheers mate…who would you say top 6 is then? God, Gibbs, Hep, Ibbo ???, ???.

        • Blazers

          June 23, 2013 at 11:40 pm

          Liking the look of T.McKenzie at 407k

        • Hugh

          June 23, 2013 at 11:49 pm

          In terms of consistency, faaark yes Hibberd is. He only has 2 scores under 80 for the year, how many other defenders apart from goddard can you say that for? he averages over 90 and has played every game only copping the tag once. jump on. only 3 defs are clearly top 6 thus far, I think they are God, hepp, gibbs. Then there are maybe 10 who are behind. Ibbotson, whilst is still awesome, is not in that category yet, he hasnt played every game and has had 2 stinkers in 8 games. Thats 25% of the time. where as Hibberd only has 2 under 80 from 12 games (16 and a bit %). Hibberd’s style of footy, half back running, and he kicks the odd goal too, is great dream teaming, and he is miles down in the tagging line. JUMP ON

          • mbrucie

            June 24, 2013 at 12:04 am

            Cheers Blazers and Hugh…will be tossing up between Hibberd and TMac all week. Hibberd’s soft draw might get him over the line though. Thanks.

  13. Westozzie

    June 23, 2013 at 11:14 pm

    great article always good for a laugh thankyou

  14. coxtapstoswallow

    June 23, 2013 at 11:19 pm

    caff –> daniher
    vlaustin –> gibbs

    • Billy

      June 23, 2013 at 11:31 pm

      good trades, gibbs a must have daniher is best 22 too

    • mfawcett

      June 24, 2013 at 12:20 am

      very similar but I got rid of Caff last week and going Dwyer this week to Daniher and Vlastuin to Gibbs same as you:) Good trades I think:)

  15. Charles

    June 23, 2013 at 11:20 pm

    good as always

    daniher/schultz ??

  16. Mikey

    June 23, 2013 at 11:25 pm

    Thank god I opted out of Hrovat… what a muppet!
    Birchall GAWN!!!

    Love it Matt!

  17. Billy

    June 23, 2013 at 11:28 pm

    Trading out Birchall for mid swap to Boyd and downgrading Macaffer to Daniher…

    Got Birch in at prem price and delivered nothing but dud scores, enough is enough. premo priced players anything under 90 is unacceptable!

    Down back I still got rookies Terlich, Goodes, Ellis and Vlastuin along with established Gibbs and Goddard while Boyd rounds out my mid field of Swan, Ablett, Pendles, Watson, Barlow, Fyfe, Danger and now Boyd.

    Projected total 2300’s booya! So long Birchall!

    • Billy

      June 23, 2013 at 11:28 pm

      Great article, very funny too!

  18. Shags

    June 23, 2013 at 11:29 pm

    This round killed my enthusiam. Funny thing is i moved up the rankings with my 1694.
    Now in the top 2000.
    Still Im shattered that I didnt upgrade to Boyd like my original plan, instead getting in hrovat.
    Happy byes are over. Going to take a break until teams are named thursday night.

  19. George

    June 23, 2013 at 11:38 pm

    what do you think of my possible trades
    1- caff to daniher, vlustuin to ablett
    2. ” ” to heppel
    only reason i look at number 2 is because it gives me 140k and next week i will get in ablett through his high be and by subbing heppel into def via terlich and upgrading to ablett

  20. Hotties

    June 23, 2013 at 11:51 pm

    yes. 6/6 this week in tipping. makes up for my shizer dt score!

    • mbrucie

      June 24, 2013 at 12:05 am

      How the hell did you tip Brisbane AND Port?!?!?!?!?!

      • Hotties

        June 24, 2013 at 12:20 am

        well probably why im coming last in my tipping leageu!

  21. Darth Vader

    June 24, 2013 at 12:07 am

    Great article.
    I notice there’s a game on Thursday night hence we will miss the finalised teams for Sundays 3 matches.

    • mbrucie

      June 24, 2013 at 12:15 am

      There is a partial lockout on Thursday night, meaning that only our Essendon and WCE players will be locked in.

      • mfawcett

        June 24, 2013 at 12:20 am

        which means Captain loophole I presuming?

        • mbrucie

          June 24, 2013 at 12:30 am

          Yep…Stants and Watson the main candidates.

          • mfawcett

            June 24, 2013 at 1:02 am

            Scooter, maybe Priddis, Josh Kennedy, Goddard, Heppel, Cox, Nic Nat, Waters, Zaharakis. Definitley a lot of options and yes, Stanton and Watson would be the prime ones but for those that may not have them plenty of other choices to loophole through and all can go off for big/decent scores of 120+

  22. Lewie-14

    June 24, 2013 at 12:12 am

    Birchall to Heppell and Vlaustin to Gibbs ?? $92000 left

    • mfawcett

      June 24, 2013 at 2:16 am

      sound like very sound trades right there:) No other issues elsewhere first though?

    • Bradleyconca

      June 24, 2013 at 10:59 am

      Very good Trades!

  23. T.Mac-37

    June 24, 2013 at 7:50 am

    Trade thoughts this week Dwyer to Daniher and Vlaustain to Gibbs leaving me with $91,000 for next weeks trades.

  24. Simon

    June 24, 2013 at 8:47 am

    Looking forward to Jeppa’s Jrs just that little bit more than usual this week as we look for the right guys to help us premo-load our teams

  25. rubbers0ul

    June 24, 2013 at 8:51 am

    are there reverse trades this wknd?

    • Tim

      June 24, 2013 at 3:58 pm

      Up until the partial lockout on Thursday. No reverse of any trades after that.

  26. RaphClarke.JamesGwilt

    June 24, 2013 at 9:17 am

    Anyone considering downgrade Blicavs to an 89k player for the cash considering most people have 2 premos and Tom Nicholls as cover, Blicavs’ cash is sort of wasting away on the bench.

    • Blazers

      June 24, 2013 at 10:54 am

      Do it, although you could still wait another week as he will beat his BE this week

    • Simon

      June 24, 2013 at 12:14 pm

      Not me man, Blic’s R2 and Nicholls is R3 now thanks to Luey’s “6 week” injury. Until this structure steers me wrong I won’t be upgrading either of them.

    • Tim

      June 24, 2013 at 4:00 pm

      Wait at least a week or 2 with a BE of 20 this week, there’s more to be made (i.e. there must be someone better to dump for Daniher, Hunter, or Clisby).

  27. Ticonderous

    June 24, 2013 at 9:41 am

    Dilemma for me is do i start Tom Mitchell over Sam Mitchell ????????

    any help lads

    • Blazers

      June 24, 2013 at 10:53 am

      Tough one, maybe have to say Sam Mitchell as you’re guarenteed a 95-110 whereas we don’t know Tom Mitchell’s floor as yet, but he could score anything, have to go with reliability especially when Smitchell’s opponent’s, Lions, give up DT points fairly generously.

  28. Dos Man

    June 24, 2013 at 11:08 am

    once again i read the whole article feeling sorry for you only to see you have scored well. Pretty sick of it, you really dont have anything to be complaining about.

    • Simon

      June 24, 2013 at 12:16 pm

      Poor bugger got the gig at the start of the year and has been on fire ever since. Hardly his fault. Can’t wait to read his article if / when his team goes to sh!t ;)

    • Matt

      June 24, 2013 at 2:33 pm

      haha want me to stop writing it then? :P Just have a laugh! First few rounds were interesting!!!

  29. redvest

    June 24, 2013 at 1:29 pm

    Nice article mate, after that rant I assumed a sub 1700 score but you did ok.

    While you are adverse to the word *** now, I can’t say the same, the REZ7 league has cracked the top 10 so as of now we are the Dreamers who say BYE.

    Throw in the odd Bye! Ni!! Bye! Ni! Ecky-ecky-ecky-ecky-Pf’tang, Zzoo-Boing, gdgdbaaoizen :)

    Love the BYE rounds, looking forward to 6 of them. Makes the game interesting.


  30. Mark

    June 24, 2013 at 3:17 pm

    any word on Birch? Seriously considering starting Thurlow over him if named

  31. Mark

    June 24, 2013 at 3:18 pm

    Also considering Boyd for captain this week against Melbs, thoughts?

  32. Mark

    June 24, 2013 at 3:21 pm

    Stevie J out for 2……Fark

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