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The Sunday Knee-Jerk – Round 10

Well I thought things were looking up. My team was coming together and those painful rookie scores were slowly filtering out of my side. So you can imagine my emotions as I look at my team carrying 2 scores below 40, WITH NO INJURIES! Brilliant. It’s time to knee-jerk!

Well I thought things were looking up. My team was coming together and those painful rookie scores were slowly filtering out of my side. So you can imagine my emotions as I look at my team carrying 2 scores below 40, WITH NO INJURIES! Brilliant. Not to mention the portion of my salary cap sitting on the bench. This week was simple. If you managed to pull a Neo and dodge the few bullets, you’re laughing. If not then you’ve probably been listening to too much Bruno Mars and caught a grenade for someone. It’s time to knee-jerk!

The Legends

There are plenty of guys out there that deserve the first mention more than this bloke… but let’s be serious here. Will Minson (122) (or as I like to call him, WILBUR!!!) has been gunning it this season. He flew under almost everyone’s radar before smashing out a clean 57 hitouts (the 4th highest in history) and even soccered a forward pockets goal. Not to mention 7 tackles! He is the cult hero of my dream team. I don’t joke, he’s a handy price with some great fixtures leading through until Round 15, he has to be on the watchlist. In fact leave him alone, I’m perfectly happy with his 2% ownership. Bald Jesus (140) proved that we should never doubt him, crisply pumping out his 4th 130+ total in a row. It boggles the mind as to why we ever doubt him. Swan (123) is not yet back to his pigging days IMO, however we saw some great signs on Friday night. He has Melbourne next week, the true test of his hunger for extra points. I know the stars seem to be aligning for him, but my erection is barely at 25%. Ok that was a lie, I’m raging ****ing full blown out of my mind. Get ready for a 180. Bartel (119) is seriously doing the business this season, back to his Mr Consistent days. Remind me to send a thank you gift to VS at the end of the season for naming him as a DPP. Barlow (118) is setting the bar about as high as it gets right now, absolute DT jet. It’s like watching a seagull go to work next to the fish and chip shop down at the beach. He feeds of the scraps, perfect DT viewing. Finally Tom Mitchell (98). Hale School represent, he is an absolute jet. The next premium midfielder is right before our eyes, he will never be this cheap again. Jump on him after his Rd 12 bye, however I’ll seriously consider him this week as well.

The Sunday Chops

Where to start. The biggest issue was that this weeks losers didn’t just notch a poor 70 odd. They went all out to screw us over, not 1 registering above 60. Bloody Hanley (35). I’ll reserve my anger here as he’s been fantastic so far this season. I’ll take the extra points from Macaffer (105) (No he’s not a winner this week, he’s a massive tossbag). Let’s hope tight tags don’t become the regular, I don’t really want to own the next Birchall (78). Scotland (50) looked to be a stroke of genius after a couple of solid scores post the GDC (Great Defensive Crisis). Now there’s a whole heap of egg in some faces. This year we can safely say he is too old! Franklin (60) is going to cause some nightmares. And some dented walls. The once un-stoppable forward is doing his best to get picked up by another club on a $200,000 contract spanning over 2 years before he leaves for Fiji to retire. Disinterested doesn’t do it justice. All I can say is thank the holy DT lord I steered clear, he will always be cheap enough to pick up if things turn around. Now for the 2 real killers for the weekend. Ok, the one real killer of the weekend and the personal sh*tstain on my DT. Maloney (24) injured his shoulder and was subbed at half time. Very unlucky, I feel for all those that stuck by him. Now you’re in a real world of pain, I know how you feel. However my blokes sh*tness was not due to an injury. Matt Jones (40) has been brilliant all year. I was relying on him for 2 more average scores before sadly waving goodbye during his bye. Now he’ll be lucky to last until that bye. He was looking good for another 70-80 after he burst out of the blocks in Q1. Of course a sub was then activated during the third quarter, after which thousands of coaches simultaneously lit themselves on fire. For this reason solely I hope Mark Neeld cops the sack. Don’t mess with my DT! Oh yeah. For Warnie’s sake, could Nicholas Kommer (36) please remove his name from the DT database. Much appreciated.

The Clown

How many times is it possible to aim the clown at someone? The review system has it’s weekly entries, none worse than the inconclusive debacle when Adelaide’s Paddy Dangerfield slotted a goal and the goal umpire standing directly under the post was overruled by the boundary ump who was side on. People have tried to tell me that the ball hit the post but there is no way, it wasn’t a straight deviation, the ball swung back in the other direction. There’s no way it was conclusive so surely you have to stick with the goal ump, what’s the point of having them? 2 goal umpires on either post and let’s move on. Scrap the review system also, it will save some time and probably help my mental state. I’m starting to repeat the words “inconclusive” in my nightmares.

What we’ve learnt?

  • Monday Night games are loved by nobody. I switch into footy mode on Friday night, and switch off when DT opens on a Sunday evening. Footy is for weekends, not weekdays! Especially when we have to put up with a mediocre Sunday. I’ll be off to the footy tomorrow but my mind won’t be in the right place, god help me if we lose…
  • Dedicated to you Jonesy. I wish today could be fixed…
  • Dedicated to you Macaffer.
  • BREAKING: Neeld has just loaded
  • The Kangas made extra sure there was no choking possible in Boomers 350th. They did however get out scored from the start of the second quarter. Forever a pessimist.
  • Sam Mitchell proved the stats never lie. His highest previous career score against the Dees was 117, however it was expected he’d just top that “because its Melbourne”. 63 points later some delete team buttons will have been put to work.
  • Ok, I just lied when I said the stats never lie. They almost never lie. Stevie J sold Kelvin (Calvin, sh*t. Easy one to mix up) up the river with a 94 point effort on a historic Saturday night. There was nothing historic about the amount of hindsight geniuses claiming how stupid we were for going SJ. I mean, how dumb. The in-form player in the comp with a 5 game average of 127 and 8 140+ scores in his last 9 against bottom 4 opposition. Where was the logic in that?
  • The obvious mistake made was that Gold Coast are no longer to be messed with. Take note!
  •  46 points lost, key lessons learnt. Move on.
  • *Insert Niggas in Paris beat here* So I Dream so hard mother****ers wanna find me, but first Jones has gotta find me, whats 40 points to a mother****er like me can you please remind me?……. A lot. That’s a lot of points to any normal DTer.
  • At around 2:53 PM WST news got through of a substitution. This was my DT reaction.

This game sh*ts me

It doesn’t matter how well your team plays, it just takes 1 or 2 acts of complete sh*tness to screw up your DT for the weekend. However here is where this expands. Not only is Neeld’s final sub decision as an AFL coach (Jumping the gun) the last **** up he will make, but my DT will duly suffer the consequences for weeks to come. A couple of 70’s would have brought Jonesy’s price up to 370k. Instead he will fall to under 350k and face a massive BE next week. The ensuing result is my original bye plans in tatters and a sore knuckle. And that’s why this game sh*ts me.

The other bits and pieces.

Trade plans can be put on hold for at least another day as we wait for what seems like an eternity for this lockout to end. I’m currently sitting on 1768 with Cox, Priddis, JJK and Vlastuin to play. Solid, but I will still lose ground on my main competitors. You need everything to go right at the top and I can’t seem to catch a break recently! Hopefully what goes around comes around for those above me, I’ll also look forward to collecting the casual 850k sitting on my pine. How did you guys go? I reckon par might be around 2100 providing we don’t get the usual bullsh*t in tomorrow’s game. That’s it from me, I hope you all went well but in reality that ain’t the truth! Feel free to knee-jerk below. Cheers.

If you enjoyed my raging and want a hittable punching bag when sh*t goes tits up, follow me on twitter @MattCraigDT. My views are honest, mostly helpful and occasionally entertaining! Also hit me up with any suggestions for who you thought were the Legends, Losers and Clowns, plus what you’ve learnt the past week. I value everyone’s opinion!



  1. Kamil Machaj

    June 2, 2013 at 9:49 pm

    Great job, you forgot Hodge with 53

    • Matt

      June 2, 2013 at 9:51 pm

      I know haha I missed Hodgey’s sub and Smurph’s second stinker score. I need help getting them all!

      • Kamil Machaj

        June 2, 2013 at 9:59 pm

        I laughed when my mate told me he’s sick of Cachia outscoring Muprhy

  2. jasper

    June 2, 2013 at 9:51 pm

    spelt moloney wrong

    • Matt

      June 2, 2013 at 10:02 pm

      Cheers haha, won’t have to say his name again!

      • jasper

        June 2, 2013 at 10:51 pm

        yeh trade him out this week everyone

  3. Ned

    June 2, 2013 at 9:51 pm

    Top Article, once again!

    Trying to figure out which of my numerous Rd11 bye duds I should trade out.

    Which would you prioritize out of Neade, Buddy, Burgoyne, Birchall or Moloney

    Looking to go Moloney -> Swallow, Buddy -> Boomer but Neade has been a pain in the arse from the first bounce.

  4. Chatta

    June 2, 2013 at 9:58 pm

    Yes HODGE – 53 – decided stupidly to put the BIG C on Hodge this week – playing Melbourne – teams playing Melbourne have had 8-10 players scoring 100+ – Hodge been in good form – thought he would smash 120+ Well thanks for nothin Clarkson going to lose 3 leagues by under 20 because you subbed him off just after the start of the 3rd quarter – FMDT

    • twalks_95

      June 2, 2013 at 10:28 pm

      Yeah I went Buddy as captain, completely for the reason it was Melbourne and it was round 13 last year when he got 204 dt points. Had Hodge, Birchall, Franklin x2. Lewis only shining light

      • Balayah

        June 3, 2013 at 6:28 am

        The only thing worse than one Franklin, is two.

      • Tim

        June 3, 2013 at 11:06 pm

        People don’t seem to realise that Frawley is Melbourne’s best player (or maybe second only to Clark). Yes, Hawthorn were always going to thump Melbourne and when the midfield’s on top there’s only so much Frawley can do, but Franklin was never going to absolutely dominate.

  5. Michael

    June 2, 2013 at 10:02 pm

    great read mate, i think Kreuzer deserves a mention as well with many getting him in for Luey and getting 119

    • Matt

      June 2, 2013 at 10:04 pm

      Ah true, I got carried away with Big Boy Minson haha. Great pick, Rd 13 bye was my only concern

  6. Matt

    June 2, 2013 at 10:09 pm

    + Credit to Griffen, highest score of the year!

  7. sam

    June 2, 2013 at 10:55 pm

    Will moloney be back for round 12. How long is he out for?

  8. Eagleing

    June 2, 2013 at 10:57 pm

    One more knee jerk Matt – the ridiculous AFL scheduling. No-one likes Monday night football! I don’t care that it’s a public holiday. It’s not even just that I like DT finishing on a Sunday night and that I want to rage trade. From a supporter’s perspective, it’s way too spread out, and frankly boring. And guess what? There’s only six games next weekend, spread over four days. Turn it up.

  9. Blazers

    June 2, 2013 at 11:01 pm

    Would it be worth getting Stanton this week for Moloney in theory? Absolutely killed it in past two?

    • Matt

      June 2, 2013 at 11:09 pm

      Round 13 bye my only concern

  10. Dash

    June 2, 2013 at 11:13 pm

    monday games suck for sure, this is the time to rage trading x100.
    much prefer thursday games, dont we agree?!!

    • Jay

      June 3, 2013 at 8:58 am


  11. Bugger

    June 2, 2013 at 11:30 pm

    Hmmmmmm.. Well when my mate and ARCH Nemesis said he was going balls deep with me this week he wasn’t kidding.

    Copped 1 – Maloney – 24, Hanley – 35, Franklin – 60 (you c**t) etc

    with Lewy, Rocky & clokey on my pine.

    Franklin gone this week maybe.. I know some will say WTF but I say when he cranks out a 200,i’ll still be ahead.
    Franklin is cloke of last year.
    He is now DT Irrelevant.

  12. discomute

    June 2, 2013 at 11:31 pm

    Eagling – so true about scheduling. Dumbest bit has to be 2 games on a Sunday, both in Melbourne, one is twilight the other is delayed by 40 minutes past the normal time! AFL – why overlap the only two games like that????

  13. Vishnu27

    June 3, 2013 at 12:38 am

    In complete agreement with Eagling & discomute. This round needs to be over already! Coupled with the byes sucking the life out of DT for three weeks. First world problems.

    I scored Moloney’s softness, Hanley chimping it (with Laird’s ton taunting me on the sideline), Matt Jones, Staker onfield (with Caff’s ton taunting me on the sideline), which I capped off by captaining SJ.

    Not all bad though: good to see Swanny score 130. And a nod to Dean Terlich. Definitely one hard nut. Respect for another solid score. Happy with my Mayes=>Stanton trade this week.

    Moloney looks like becoming Montagna & Jones=> Tom Mitchell by this time tomorrow. Then reversed throughout the week numerous times. Of that I’m sure…

  14. Daniel

    June 3, 2013 at 1:08 am

    Hanley, Watson, Scotland, H Shaw, Staker, Franklin, Sam Mitchell (traded in this week!).

    Stevie J Captain.

    Can anyone beat that sh*t sandwich of a week??

    I just deleted my Elite team with Sam Fisher on -1 at half time

    This game sh*ts me.

    • Vishnu27

      June 3, 2013 at 1:18 am

      Oh yeah, thanks for reminding me Dan: I had Sam Mitchell spudding it hard too

    • Gavin

      June 3, 2013 at 4:05 am

      Yes i can beat that. My sh*t sandwich:

      Hanley, Watson, Scotland, H.Shaw, Neade, Franklin, S.Mitchell, StevieJ (capt), Birchall, Evans, J.Selwood, and Hrovat.

      My projected score is 1849. I’ve given up on this season, despite the fact i have 18 premiums in my team, and a net value of $11,382,000. I have not cracked 2100 points once this season, and my ranking has dropped from a high of 700 odd, down to currently 13,000 odd. After this weekend i think ill be outside the top 20,000.

      Thanks for the memories DT 2013…..

      • Simon

        June 3, 2013 at 12:21 pm

        That’s an epic-ly sh!t week Gavin… I feel for ya mate. In some ways I’m jealous though, as I wish I could cut and run this early in the season. But no, I’m always lured by the “next week it’ll come good” philosophy. I feel abused and cheated by DT at times, but keep coming back for more week in week out. Sucker for punishment really.

  15. Maverick86


    June 3, 2013 at 2:05 am

    I loved having Birch, Buddy, Hanley, MJones, Hodge and ROK across my two teams with SJ captain of both. Gazza gave StevieJ a lesson just to teach all us unfaithful followers who handed SJ the captain’s hat this week a lesson. Never again Stevie. Until GWS anyway

    Big Ups to the fellow Old Haleian, and Eagles supporter, penning the Knee Jerk!

  16. Maverick86


    June 3, 2013 at 2:11 am

    The Matt Jones sub was very strange, he was a long way from the worst player for Melbourne today(and every other week too). Michael Evans I am looking at you

    • Hotties

      June 3, 2013 at 8:53 am

      not sure about that. his disposal efficiency is absolutely below par.

  17. Vanessa

    June 3, 2013 at 8:52 am

    What’s with the whinging about Monday games? Other than delaying the end of lockout (which is hardly a tragedy), I can’t think of any other negatives. The schedule wasn’t great with two average games on Sunday but that’s a separate issue. There’s nothing better for Mondayitis than knowing footy is on tonight.

  18. Jay

    June 3, 2013 at 9:00 am

    Have to say amongst the carnage of Moloney, Hanley, etc.. Good to see Sauce Jacbos put up a decent score – 50 hit outs, where the heck has this been all year!!

  19. DoubleA

    June 3, 2013 at 9:02 am


    Biggest rage issues, for some stupid reason (it was a weak moment), I figured K Cornes trending of shitty scores would continue on and decided to move him out, so that I could shift SJ into the mids and buy Buddy, figuring he was back on track and would storm home against the Demons. So much rage.

    Put the C on SJ instead of just doing what I always do and lock Swan or GAJ (never again)!

    Additional rage spikes for Hanley, Lance ‘FU Buddy’ Franklin, Robbie Gray, M Jones, just…..rawgghaerrrahhahakakkkllll!!!!!!!

    Thanks Blicavs for coming up trumps when I needed you.

    Was flying over the last few weeks, until a two round pill shot straight to the Ballantyne’s (Ellis out last minute last week and just everything this week)

    • DoubleA

      June 3, 2013 at 9:08 am

      The german word for that joyful feeling you get watching Ballantyne cop one in the ghoulies is called Haydenfreude.

      • DoubleA

        June 3, 2013 at 9:08 am

        ^ proud of that one ^

        • Simon

          June 3, 2013 at 12:26 pm

          Not bad at all ;)

  20. The Chosen Won

    June 3, 2013 at 9:31 am

    Staker and Murphy only 2 spuds so far quite happy

  21. Jack


    June 3, 2013 at 9:47 am

    How long will molony be out for and should I trade him or keep him

    • Stange

      June 3, 2013 at 12:27 pm

      most would find few reasons of keeping him. I can’t think of other trades that are more pressing — trade him out.

      * regardless of injury, he misses week 11.
      * if he returns week 12, he will lose you all that money he made before round 10. If you keep him, it will probably be around the end of the season when he’ll get that money back – this barely rates as an investment
      * not a keeper MID with a sub-95 average. You should be targeting 105+ averaging players to keep instead.

    • Simon

      June 3, 2013 at 12:27 pm

      You sure should Jack

  22. Tyson

    June 3, 2013 at 9:50 am

    I need a big game from Maston and hope nic Nat and deledio have a below par game

  23. WastedOpportunity

    June 3, 2013 at 10:12 am

    One of my mate’s has suffered true carnage from Thursday night til now. His team stands at:
    DEF: Goddard (90), Scotland (50), Hanley (35), Shaw (61), Birchall (78), Vlastuin
    MID: GAJ (140), Pendlebury (95), Murphy (71), Mitchell (66), Hodge (53), Moloney (24), Stevens (23), Kommer (36)
    RUC: Cox, Hannath (10)
    FWD: Jenkins (53),Christensen (49) Franklin (C)(120),Cloke (0),Staker (55), Gray (34)

    This mess of a team gives him a current score of 1143, with just Cox and Vlas to come. was forced to field Staker, Kommer and Hannath because of injuries.

    • Simon

      June 3, 2013 at 12:28 pm

      Is this for real? Why couldn’t I pull him in Eliminator?!

  24. mfawcett

    June 3, 2013 at 10:22 am

    you forgot Blicvas coming through with a strong 94. He’s been Mr reliable this year casually riding the pine whilst still making some good money and steps up when Leuenberger goes down and lot of people taking the risk to play him on the field and fix up other issues first.

    • Jay

      June 3, 2013 at 10:24 am


    • mfawcett

      June 3, 2013 at 10:27 am

      other issue I had this week as did many was the BS games coming out of Melbourne and the mystery surrounding Terlich and whether or not he would play or not? Risked him maybe not playing and managed to get a respectable 78 from him which can’t complain about:)

      • SnowyCasanova

        June 3, 2013 at 11:40 am

        Turn it up mate. Melbourne were confident Terlich was going to play all week.

      • TwobeeMee

        June 3, 2013 at 12:07 pm

        he was named in their lineup. I had Terlich in my team and even if he was a late withdrawal, had put an E on the bench.

        • Simon

          June 3, 2013 at 12:29 pm

          The only people talking about him missing were on this site. Never in doubt as far as reliable sources were concerned.

  25. Brak


    June 3, 2013 at 4:57 pm

    The Game Shits Me when I want to go Luenberger to Kreuzer but have to reverse the trade when teams are named because all the outs in defence and forward. Add Thurlow and Mayes out to Leuy, Rockliff and Ellis injuries, then Cloke doesn’t play and Moloney gets 24.
    What Shits me the most is I play Hannath coming off a 64 with a BE of 11 who gets the job for just the one week and he gets subbed of on 10 pts FMDT.

  26. Lebron

    June 3, 2013 at 4:57 pm

    To anyone Doubting Buddy. I was at the game and the stupid Melbourne player held Buddy at Every Contest

    • Mumbles

      June 3, 2013 at 5:52 pm

      Pretty clever if he got away with it.

      • Tim

        June 3, 2013 at 11:12 pm

        Frawley is one of the better full back in the comp (best given age) and his only competition for best Melbourne player is Clark (with those 2 miles ahead of whoever’s third). If I were a Hawks fan I’d swap him for Lake or Schoenmakers in an instant if given the chance.

    • Shags

      June 3, 2013 at 6:10 pm

      Buddy is a shadow of his last 2 years.

  27. Shags

    June 3, 2013 at 6:05 pm

    A speculative c on Franklin and not Gaz, has cost me my head to head (except for a fluke situation tonight). I have learnt my lesson.

    • Shags

      June 3, 2013 at 6:07 pm

      Fluke situation being Priddis vs cotchin + 40points.

  28. Zac

    June 4, 2013 at 10:01 am

    I know there’s lots of FMDT moments over the season, HOWEVER, its moments like the one i had on the weekend that make you forget them all in the blink of an eye!.
    My Eliminator opponent needed 77 from NIC NAT to beat me, so you can imagine the constant checking of his stats!! Well when Big NIC was 70+ in the 3rd quarter i thought it was all over, BUT NO he went on to only score 6 more points for the rest of the game, finishing with 76 and giving me the win by 1 POINT!!! That’s why we keep coming back!

    • Zac

      June 4, 2013 at 10:06 am

      EDIT: Obviously i was too busy celebrating last night to worry about stat recount changes, He finished with 80, i lost by 3 points now. FORGET everything i said, THIS GAME SH!TS ME!!! There is no light at the end of the tunnel… FMDT!!!!

      • Matt

        June 4, 2013 at 1:05 pm

        hahaha :)

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